Lately, I find myself muttering the word “idiot” a lot when I am driving. No more of that business! And, I am going to learn to manage my time better, plan ahead for traffic and leave earlier. Basically, I will need to stop dawdling (or, as my friends call it, “Daun”dling). Time management alone will likely save me hundreds in toll bills, since I won’t be relying on costly express lanes to get me there on time. I don’t even have the stomach to look at how much I spent this year in tolls. After the holiday cheer ends, next comes tax season. I will wait until then to look at that expense. Why ruin my holiday spirit?

Until next week…

Daun Thompson
Writer / Comedienne / Artist

A Patient Driver – Comedy Defensive Driving

The post A Patient Driver appeared first on Comedy Defensive Driving®.

Goodyear recommends that you have your tires balanced and rotated every 3,000 to 6,000 miles. So, while I’m getting my oil changed I will have them do this as well. Often times irregular tire wear can be corrected by rotating your tires. It is also recommended that the alignment is checked at least once a year. Misalignment of the front or rear tires can cause rapid or uneven wear. Front wheel drive and cars with independent rear suspension require alignment of all four wheels instead of two.

A tire’s tread directly affects how it grips the road, so it’s important to inspect them regularly for visible signs of uneven wear. The penny test is recommended since it is easy to do. Insert a penny into your tire’s groove (with Lincoln’s head upside down and facing you). If you can see Lincoln’s entire head, your tire depth is less than 2/32 inch and it’s time to replace them. If you have a pocket full of change, or a quarter instead, insert it into the groove. If the tread touches Washington’s head, you have at least 4/32 inch of tread remaining.

And, as they say, the best solution is often the easiest. Properly inflated tires can benefit more than just the tread wear. It will help to ensure your safety, extend the life of your tire and even help your fuel economy.

Until next week…

Daun Thompson
Writer / Comedienne / Artist

Car Tire Care – Comedy Defensive Driving

The post Car Tire Care appeared first on Comedy Defensive Driving®.

If this should happen in the future, perhaps it is best to know how to “conserve” fuel, rather than hoarding it. Here a few tips that may help…

• Check your tire pressure often (great time to check for nails and/or an ex-girlfriend’s nail file jammed in the grooves).
• Avoid idling (fact: bank robbers may be causing a fuel crisis)
• Keep your engine tuned regularly (keep it purring like a kitten…kittens eat less than a full grown cat)
• Check for extra junk in the trunk (d.i.v.o.r.c.e.)
• Be certain to use your manufacturer’s recommended grade of oil
• Keep it close to the speed limit on the highway. It will also save you from a ticket from Johnny Law.
• Try to coast to a stop. This will surely honk other people off (check…and double check).
• Avoid slowly crawling up to a speed. 15 seconds to accelerate to 50 mph uses less fuel than taking 30 seconds to reach the same speed (this will also save you from a stray bullet from the guy in the diesel truck behind you).
• Close the car windows and run the A/C. Conserving on A/C does not really help, especially at high speeds. Be comfortable on your journey…you cheapskate!

Some refer to these driving techniques as hypermiling. Most of these techniques improve your car’s fuel efficiency by reducing the demands placed on the engine. So, it’s possible to improve fuel economy by 37% just by changing the way your drive. But, there are also some hypermiling methods that are controversial and could pose an element of danger…such as riding in a big rig’s draft. Not cool, dude…your Honda Accord could become a Honda accordion!

Until next week… Cool it on the fuel.

Daun Thompson
Writer / Comedienne / Artist

Fuel Shortage

The post Fuel Shortage appeared first on Comedy Defensive Driving®.

The latest news buzz is all about Uber and Lyft suspending their ride sharing business in Austin, Texas because they want to regulate their own drivers. While the new city ordinance requires companies like Uber and Lyft to be regulated like taxis. That means, among other things, drivers would have to be fingerprinted as part of a background check. According to a report by NPR, last year, Uber and Lyft withdrew from San Antonio over a similar requirement that drivers be fingerprinted. The companies returned months later under a program that made fingerprinting voluntary. Meanwhile, Houston also has rules requiring drivers for ride-hailing apps to be fingerprinted. Uber has previously threatened to withdraw from Houston over that ordinance. According to Culturemap Houston, the city’s mayor, Sylvester Turner, responded, “If it comes down to public safety on one hand and Uber staying on the other, I don’t think it is even close.” Chicago, Atlanta and Los Angeles are considering similar regulations on ride-hailing apps, according to The Associated Press.

So, although independent drivers may not be as stringently regulated as cab drivers, it still worries me that they may not be available in such a large “party city” like Austin. With 6th street all abuzz, South By Southwest (SXSW), Austin City Limits (ACL) and many other annual festivals where people come from all over the world to attend, and drinking is a part of that experience, for most, it is disturbing that more people will be likely to drink and drive. Although cabs will still be available, MADD (Mothers Against Drunk Drivers) claims that Uber, for one, is saving lives because it is an easy app to manipulate when impaired. The app retains your credit card information, so no money is exchanged with the driver, and the tip is already rolled into the fare. It retains your home address and GPS will let the driver know where you are when requesting a ride. Accidents and DWI related fatalities will likely be at staggering (no pun intended) all time highs (again, no pun intended).

Until next week…

Daun Thompson
Writer / Comedienne / Artist

Ridesharing – Comedy Defensive Driving

The post Ride sharing appeared first on Comedy Defensive Driving®.

The post No Left Turns appeared first on Comedy Defensive Driving®.

Gas Saving Tips

Here are a few fuel economy tips we may all want to implement:
* A little extra maintenance certainly keeps the repairman away. Unless you like the rugged good looks of your repairman. Then, by all means, keep doing what you’re doing. But, if you keep your engine properly tuned-up, it is one of the most important gas saving tips.
* Tuning up a car that is noticeably out of tune or has failed an emissions test can improve its gas mileage by an average of 4 percent. Something more serious, such as a faulty oxygen sensor can improve your mileage by as much as 40 percent.
* Keeping your tires properly inflated can improve your gas mileage by up to 3.3 percent. The proper tire pressure for your vehicle is usually found on a sticker in the driver’s side door-jam or in the glove box. It will also be in your owner’s manual.
* Use the recommended grade of motor oil, too. You can improve your gas mileage by 1 to 2 percent by using the manufacturer’s recommended grade of motor oil.
* Also keep your vehicle properly aligned. If your vehicle’s wheels are not perfectly aligned, they cause additional friction with the road. This increases fuel consumption. Aligning your vehicle will also increase your tires’ tread life. Replacing tires is yet another expense you certainly don’t need. Just ask your repairman/boyfriend how he feels about alignment. But first, lock the door so he can’t run away.

The most important way to save gas while driving is to drive the speed limit. I know it’s hard to do, especially when the flow-of-traffic is traveling much factor that the actual posted speed limit. If you’re driving the speed limit and everyone else is going 10mph faster, people act as if you’re driving like a little old lady. Speeding or rapid acceleration wastes gas:
* It can lower your gas mileage by whopping 33 percent at highway speeds and by 5 percent around town.
* Driving the speed limit will also save you in speeding tickets.
* Use cruise control whenever you can to help maintain a constant speed, which will use considerably less gas.
* If you have a car with an overdrive gear, that will also help save on fuel consumption.
* And remove any extra weight you may be carrying. But not the repairman/boyfriend…you may need him.

But all joking aside, the best way to save gas is to stay out of the left-lane (aka: the “Passing Lane”) on the freeway. Why? Because if you’re clogging up the passing lane and the flow-of-traffic is traveling faster then you, then you are impeding the masses and they will spend more gas trying to accelerate around you. Now you’re waisting other peoples gas as well… I mean, its not like everyone is going to slow down because you’re out there driving the speed limit! So be smart, stay as far to the right as possible… and know you’re doing your part to save gas.

Until next week…

Daun T.
Writer / Comedienne / Artist / Exgas-o-holic

Gas Saving Tips for Comedy Defensive Driving

The post Gas Saving Tips appeared first on Comedy Defensive Driving®.

or aka: Windows Down or Windows Up
I had a gig in Corpus Christi and decided to drive there from Dallas. It seemed cheaper than flying and we were trying to economize. Besides, on the map, it was only about three inches, which is apparently equivalent to seven hours (who knew?). That’s seven long hours of nothing to see. Between Dallas and Corpus Christi, it’s just flat and ugly (like my sister Karla). And, I didn’t even get out of Dallas County before I got pulled over by a State Trooper. He was in an unmarked car with the lights in the grille, so I didn’t even realize it was a cop until he “lit me up.” Which sounds like fun, doesn’t it? Trust me, being lit up is not fun. I escaped with a warning and my heart beating out of my chest and we made it to Corpus Christ in time for the most awesome show and fun evening ever. So far, everything was going pretty well. But, the next morning, before we even got out of town, my air conditioning quit working in my car. We had to drive seven hours with the windows down on an 85 mph toll road. The irony here is, driving to save in expenses cost us dearly in the end.

So, windows down v.s. windows up. Apparently, there is a decrease in fuel efficiency of over 20% when driving at speeds of more than 55 mph with the windows rolled down. We weren’t using the air conditioner, so we were not burning more energy. But, if we had a working air conditioner, cooling the air through the compressor (which was shot) would only have decreased the fuel efficiency by about 10%, rather than 20%+.

I have a heavy S.U.V., not an aerodynamic vehicle. So, having the windows open at 85mph surely created even more of a decrease in fuel efficiency than a more aerodynamic car. The ideal situation for fuel efficiency would have been to leave the a/c off and the windows up. But we would have roasted alive. It wasn’t a pretty sight, two females complaining and sweating for 7 hours. Arguing whether windows down v.s. windows up is even an option when the thermometer is reading a whopping 114 degrees in my car.

I lost 10 lbs on that trip. Not from sweating, but from all of the complaining. My travel companion did so much complaining that she didn’t have a voice when we got home. And she wasn’t very happy about it, but her boyfriend couldn’t have been more thrilled. I believe his exact words were “Yay! No voice. You’re the perfect woman.” I only went a few days without a/c before I got it fixed. Having the windows down at speeds of 25-35 mph did noticeably save in fuel economy. Or, maybe it was my weight loss that contributed to the difference.

Until next week…

Daun Thompson
Writer / Comedienne / Artist / Sweaty Betty

Windows Down v.s. Windows Up – Comedy Defensive Driving

The post Energy Efficient Driving appeared first on Comedy Defensive Driving®.

Until next week…you may want to re-consider that car pool to work.
Daun Thompson

The post Hot Days Mean Pricey Gas appeared first on Comedy Defensive Driving®.

· Check your tire pressure often (great time to check for nails and/or an ex-girlfriend’s nail file jammed in the grooves).

· Avoid idling (fact: bank robbers may be single-handedly causing a fuel crisis)

· Keep your engine tuned regularly (keep it purring like a kitten…kittens eat less than a full grown cat)

· Check for extra junk in the trunk (d.i.v.o.r.c.e.)

· Be certain to use your manufacturer’s recommended grade of oil

· Keep it close to the speed limit on the highway. It will also save you from a ticket from Johnny Law.

· Try to coast to a stop. This will surely piss other people off  (check…and check).

· Avoid slowly crawling up to a speed. 15 seconds to accellerate to 50 mph uses less fuel than taking 30 seconds to reach the same speed (this will also save you from a stray bullet from the guy in the dually).

· Close the car windows and run the A/C. Conserving on A/C does not really help. Especially at high speeds. Be comfortable on your journey…you cheapo!

Some refer to these driving techniques as hypermiling. Most of these techniques improve your car’s fuel efficiency by reducing the demands placed on the engine.So, it’s possible to improve fuel economy by 37% just by changing the way your drive. But, there are also some hypermiling methods that are controversial and could pose an element of danger…such as riding in a tractor trailer’s draft.Not cool, dude.

So, use your noodle.Also… Check out my April 19 blog if you’re really serious about conserving on fuel.

Until next week… Cool it on the fuel.

Daun Thompson

(Daun is a comedienne, writer and artist residing in Dallas)

The post FUEL, DO NOT FAIL ME NOW! HOW TO SAVE ON GAS THIS SUMMER appeared first on Comedy Defensive Driving®.